For the primary time in 10+ years, I rewatched my 2012 TEDx discuss:
“Nerd Health and Resetting the Recreation of Life.”
My first thought: “Whoa, Steve. These are some EPIC sideburns.”
My subsequent thought: “Daring alternative with the striped shirt, denims, and flip flops!”
Then I gave myself some grace.
I’m deeply uncomfortable with the highlight. I hate public talking. It makes me need to vomit each single time. I additionally don’t like being on digicam.
And but, I’ve concepts that I believe will help folks.
So I write and share my concepts. And generally, I power myself to get on stage. For this discuss, I needed to take two buses by means of the jungles of Ecuador (the place I used to be dwelling on the time), after which take two flights to get to Atlanta.
I stayed at my buddy Kappy’s home, and the evening earlier than the discuss, I made a decision to remain up and rewrite the entire rattling factor. That morning, I practiced my discuss to his two canines, after which hurried over to Emory and simply went full YOLO and shouted my discuss into the universe.
12 years later, rewatching this discuss, I’ve ideas.
If you wish to make a journey down reminiscence lane, you may watch the discuss on YouTube, which surprisingly has over 100,000 views.
My Greatest Shock Rewatching…
It wasn’t as embarrassing as I assumed!
Child Steve really had some first rate concepts and was an okay storyteller! Particularly when you think about I had rewritten your complete discuss 12 hours prior and was on zero hours of sleep. Oh, to be younger and naive once more.
That is the slide that cracked me up probably the most, and I believe the one I need to spend probably the most period of time on:
All through most of my early 20s, I spent an unhealthy period of time taking part in video video games. On the time, I had satisfied myself that the video video games have been the issue. They’d turn into too addicting, too pleasing, and so they have been the explanation I wasn’t making a lot progress in my actual life.
The fact is one stage deeper. It wasn’t simply the video video games. It was that I didn’t have a lot life to stay up for. I didn’t like my job (promoting building gear), I didn’t have targets or issues in my private life to stay up for. So I escaped into video video games.
Older and wiser and with shorter sideburns, I’ve a greater understanding of human conduct and my very own private struggles with procrastination and escape.
As specified by my buddy Nir Eyal’s guide Indistractable, if we don’t tackle the foundation explanation for distraction or escape, our brains will get superb at discovering one more factor to get hooked on!
In different phrases, in the event you can go one stage deeper as to WHY you’re procrastinating or avoiding actuality (probably with the assist of remedy) it may possibly make it easier to get out of the rut.
As soon as I discovered one thing to stay up for (for me it was turning life into an journey online game like Zelda and EverQuest), instantly video video games turned a far much less interesting use of my restricted free time.
Today, I nonetheless play video video games repeatedly (I simply completed Fallout 4), however I now know extra.
When video video games take over an excessive amount of of my life, it’s most likely as a result of I’m avoiding confronting the truth of an issue in life.
Possibly I’m scared to get again to work on my secret-book-shaped venture, as a result of I fear it’s not adequate. Or perhaps I’m avoiding an uncomfortable dialog or addressing an actual drawback in my life.
So, the answer isn’t unplugging the Ps. It’s addressing the issue I’m really working laborious to keep away from.
It’s higher to know why I’m procrastinating as a substitute of simply blaming it on video video games.
How’s My Epic Quest Going?
In my discuss, I discuss my Bucket Checklist, which I renamed my Epic Quest of Superior. For a great 8 years, this was a giant focus of mine.
Actually incomes expertise factors for engaging in quests in actual life.
I did this after exercising around the globe and dwelling 14 months of journey journey.
I even acquired a guide printed about turning life right into a recreation, Stage Up Your Life, again in 2016. I lately reacquired the rights to this guide, and I’m hoping to place out a Model 2 within the coming yr.
(Because of this you may’t purchase it now, sorry about that!).
12 years later, life is a bit completely different.
In the event you’ve been studying this article for the previous yr, you may need observed a theme: acceptance and self-compassion.
I’ve modified my perspective on targets.
I had run myself ragged for over a decade, constructing Nerd Health, giving as a lot as attainable, chasing the subsequent purpose. Every purpose led to the subsequent purpose. Every dragon slain required me to go discover one other dragon.
It turned an limitless loop of perpetual “extra extra extra.”
And ultimately I noticed that I had gotten fairly distant from what really made me comfortable.
These previous few years, I’ve determined to reside a bit in a different way.
As an alternative of massive long run targets with dramatically organized plans, I’ve narrowed my focus to: “How can I’ve a great day at this time?”
I reside as if I’ll NEVER “get there.”
I nonetheless have targets, and I nonetheless have issues I hope to perform in life.
I’m simply taking part in a special recreation than I used to be at 28. I believe this “life is a recreation” philosophy served me properly on the time, and I believe now I’ve added just a few additional doses of actuality to how this performs out.
For someone caught in a rut, and escaping an excessive amount of into digital worlds, I believe occupied with life like a online game generally is a fairly enjoyable technique to try to escape of that rut.
It won’t work for everyone, however I believe having issues to stay up for, and targets to work on, after which discovering methods to make tiny bits of progress will help.
I cowl this in an article known as “A Nerd’s Information to Success and Happiness” which nonetheless holds up!
A bit little bit of nuance and perspective can go a great distance when gamifying life!
Wading into the Remark Part…
I made the perilous option to wade into the cesspool of the web:
The remark part on my video.
I used to be shocked to see that 95% of the feedback have been tremendous optimistic!
There was one remark although, that supplied me a singular alternative to do one thing I’ve all the time wished to do.
Show someone improper on the web.
In my discuss, I discussed that I hoped to at some point deadlift 400+ kilos. I grew up scrawny and weak, and I later discovered that I’ve spondylolisthesis, which implies two of my vertebrae don’t line up.
For the previous 15 years, deadlifting has been my favourite train. It’s the motion that has made me really feel probably the most sturdy and empowered.
I went and located a video of myself from 2018, the place after 6+ years of devoted, gradual development and deal with getting stronger, I deadlifted 420 kilos at a body weight of 172 lbs. No belt, straps, and double overhand grip too!
And sure. 12 years later, I HAD to answer and let the man know I did it.
Not gonna lie, it felt good proving a random web commenter improper! Hahahaha
Petty and pointless? Yep!
Satisfying? Very.
Two Buttons: Energy and Reset
I completed my discuss with one thing that was much more highly effective than I had anticipated.
The unique Nintendo Leisure System has two buttons: POWER and RESET.
Within the recreation of life, we get to hit the ability button as soon as. It activates once we’re born, and it turns off once we die.
However we even have a chance to hit the RESET Button. If there’s a thought or id you’ve got that’s not serving you, or some facet of life that simply isn’t working…it’s okay to hit the reset button.
It’s okay to attempt once more, even in the event you failed the final time.
Keep in mind, our information carries over, and we by no means begin again at sq. one.
Recreation on, my fellow nerd!
-Steve
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